fudge

Thursday, 28 February 2013

Five Sentence Fiction - Empty

It's been such a long time since I've participated in FSF with Lillie.  Each week I mean to write something and then time just flows on and I miss the moment.

This probably isn't my best piece of writing but it is a little snapshot memory of my childhood.

Empty

Dolefully she ran her dampened finger around the plate wanting to catch every last golden crumb - every sparkling grain of sugar before popping it into her mouth and savouring the sweetness.

The sun was warm on her bare arms and legs - the chickens gently chuckled to themselves as they scratched and pawed at the dirt looking for worms - the scent of mint filled the air, crushed beneath her careless feet and only the low drone of a solitary bee wandering from flower to flower broke the stillness of the hot afternoon.

Placing the plate carefully beside her she wriggled forwards on the wooden bench until her toes touched the ground and then, plate in hand, she pushed open the heavy door into the coolness of the pantry.

From her vantage point she could see her Grandmother in the kitchen, oven mitts encased her liver spotted hands as she bent to open the oven door.

Her senses were assailed by the aroma of freshly baked bread and she smiled - in her Grandmothers house her plate was never empty for long.

22 comments:

McGuffy Ann said...

I love this homespun tale. Very nice.
I am a new follower! Hope you may join me, too.

Robin Leigh Morgan said...

Sarah,
Loved your imagery. This is something I'd loved to have experienced but I never did/could as I've lived in the NYC area all my life, and never knew any of my grandparents.

pam said...

Gosh

what a treat for the senses, with wriggly toes and smells and sounds. I can feel the heat from here and feel all relaxed and homely xx

Sarah said...

Thank you Ann - some part of my childhood had a simplicity that was magical.

Thank you Robin - I could wish that every child (my own included) could have the memories I'm so lucky to have.

Thanks PP - that's exactly how I wanted it to make you feel, it's how I remember feeling :) xx

Lisa Shambrook said...

Really enjoyed that, brought back memories of crushing mint in my fingers and hot afternoons in the garden. My grandparents grew sweetcorn which we hid amongst and we stole apples from their apple tree!

injaynesworld said...

What a lovely, sweet story. I really like the point of view of the child. Excellent!

Lauren said...

Your story evokes so many relatable memories. It brought me back to my grandmother's kitchen.

Josie Two Shoes said...

Wonderful, sentimental piece, and good food so often ties into that! Cooking and a grandmother's love, a beautiful sunny day, it just doesn't get better than this! If only we never had to grow up and live in the big cold world.

lizzie loodles said...

Brought back memories of my grandparents. Beautiful imagery and well written. I love the positiveness take on the prompt at the end. x

Sarah said...

The smell of fresh mint always takes me right back to a good place Lisa :)

Thank you Jayne.

It's a good place to spend some time isn't it Lauren?

Thank you Josie - wouldn't it be nice to stay there forever?

Thank you Lizzie - empty is usually negative but this was the story that came to mind as soon as I read the prompt.

Angela said...

Funny....it's below freezing outside (and not much warmer in the house, feels like), and yet this story warmed me right up! That's some beautifully strong imagery - the smells, the warmth, the sounds and silence --- gorgeous work!

Lillie Kate said...

I love the imagery in these sentences. I felt that that little girl again, sitting in my own grandmother's kitchen knowing there would always be more goodies to eat :) Awesome!!

Sarah said...

It's been so cold here too Angela and remembering warmed me inside and out too. :)

Thank you Lillie - that's how it was for me too.

Kate N said...

Really nice flow to this and such a tender image that you wanted to smell the aromas too, great!

Sarah said...

Thank you Kate :)

Jazzbumpa said...

You've shown (not told) a sweet memory. one that would be sweet, even without the sugar.

Cheers!
JzB

Sarah said...

Thank you JzB :)

Mary T Bradford said...

What a beautiful tale, well told and so nice to see an entry that has a feel good theme for the prompt word. I loved this, thanks for sharing

Sarah said...

Thank you for your lovely comment Mary.

K R Smith said...

You can feel a lot of the scene here - the colors, smells, and sounds. Very descriptive without being obvious. Nice story!

And it reminds me of my one grandmother who always had blackberry preserves around...

Cher Green said...

:) Love the scene set here. Great job.

Sarah said...

Thank you KRS - it's good to remember isn't it?

Thanks Cher :)