Monday, 25 November 2013

Revisiting Rock Chick

Long time readers of Fudge may recall the story of Rock Chick. It's a character loosely (and, at times, not so loosely) based on me. Most of the stories are real to a greater or lesser degree and all are 100% true if not 100% of the truth.

The story began life as part of the Write on Wednesday series about two and a half years ago and I linked up on a weekly basis with Gill at Ink, Paper, Pen.

Sadly Gill and her blog disappeared about nine months later and the Rock Chick story didn't really have anywhere to go. Maybe it had just run it's course at that point, perhaps there was nothing more to say.

Now seems like a good time to revisit Rock Chick.

Several things have happened lately, small and insignificant in isolation but, for me, as a whole, they add up to questions.

Questions about me, where I am, where I'm going,  where I want to be and, perhaps even more importantly, the place I want others have in my life ...

 Maybe in part it's the realisation that the place I have in some peoples lives isn't necessarily a place I'm comfortable with and so it seems that now there is more to say.

I've decided that Monday will be the day that I republish/write new Rock Chick stories. I can't promise consistency, you know me, full of good intentions … but for now, that's the plan.

The very first prompt for Rock Chick was to log into Facebook and take the first status update you saw as your prompt. I am republishing the first part of the story as it was written back in July 2011.

Writing Rock Chick was often almost a compulsion for me, a cathartic experience when things seemed very bleak and confusing and life made very little sense. I never really did make any sense out of it all. The things that confused me still do but the bleakness has a way of dispersing over time.

Life goes on, a level of acceptance is reached and happiness returns in a different form.

I'm hoping that revisiting the story will rejuvenate Fudge a little as well as helping me make sense of where I am now and perhaps it will also give me back some of that enthusiasm to write that's been missing for far too long ….

“Dress code Rock Chick!!  Time for a wardrobe rethink …….”

She contemplated the outfit laid out on the bed.  Normally a fairly confident person she was unused to self doubt (well, in her personal appearance anyway).

There was a fine line between sexy and sad as you got older and, although she didn’t feel, it the truth was that there would probably be lots of twenty something’s out there.  She didn’t feel the need to compete with them. She was happy in her own skin. But getting this right suddenly seemed so important.

Studying herself in the mirror she touched the tousled hair untamed for just one night.  Smoky eyes dominated her face, her lips a soft red.  Dressed all in black, skin tight jeans and high heeled boots accentuated the length of her legs.  The silky top caressing her curves rather than exposing them and the wide leather belt with silver studs slung around her hips added that rock chick effect. 

All that was needed was her favourite jewellery, a mist of perfume and she was good to go. Worn hoops of silver swag from her lobes and the Aquamarine pendent nestled in the hollow of her throat.

Picking up the delicate silver bangle with the turquoise stone she hesitated for just a moment before slipping it over her wrist.

With a deep breath and a bright smile she gently closed the door on the doubts in her mind.

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