Blogging in the Dark

No, literally!!

That'll teach me to have the laptop next to the bed.

To an insomniac that's like leaving an open box of malteasers in the bedside drawer of a chocoholic (damn, I seem to have one of those too;)

So, NaBloPoMo has finished.  30 days of solid blogging (well, apart from a few where blogger wouldn't let me in).

It's been great mostly.  A distraction from other stuff that's been going on.

Maybe that's not such a good thing though.  I've been hiding behind my blog and hoping the other stuff would go away but it hasn't.

Today the children were at home due to the teachers being on strike but they had made their own plans and so, when my friend 'surfer dude' called (he's a teacher btw) to say did I fancy a couple of hours out somewhere to enjoy the beautiful day we were having in Somerset I leapt at the chance.

You know how sometimes someone gets it exactly right?

We went to Hestercombe Gardens just outside Taunton in the Quantock hills.

I've pinched these photos from their website 

Beautiful isn't it?

We walked, we talked, we had two lattes each in the cafe and we had a bit of a mooch around the gift shop.

I so NEEDED to get out.  Thank you surfer dude!

Then he dropped me in town so, that amongst other things I could get the children's advent calenders (first of all pressing an umbrella on me as it has started to pour down).

Shopping done and on my way home I had a call from Miss Mac - her friends Mum (who she had spent the day with) couldn't drop her home after all, could I walk over and pick her up.

Three heavy bags of shopping and somehow I'd lost that damned umbrella.  How I don't have the faintest idea and it was still peeing down.

Deep bloody joy!

Home at last, soaked and freezing, tea in the oven and Double D rang - had I remembered we had a parks meeting tonight at 6 (it was 5:45).

Well of course I hadn't bloody remembered but as I had the notes from the Council meeting I HAD to go.

By the time I got home at about 7:45 I was right back to where I had been this morning - F*ucking fed up!

I logged on to the blog and saw some comments on my WoW post saying what a romantic story it was.

Well yes, it is, but it's only part of the story and it's taken out of context.  But any new commers couldn't possibly know that.

I kept it simple.

I wanted to tell it without bringing in anything else.

I wanted to keep it a pure memory.

There is a big part of me that thinks it should have remained untold.

All the good from the afternoon was all but wiped out and I was feeling very sorry for myself.

Then I read some comments from some of my favourite blogging buddies (you know who you are:)

And guess what?

I bawled my eyes out!

Well, of course I did, what did you expect? :)

BUT - when I'd stopped (Christ I looked hideous) - I decided that life only seems so hopeless because it's all a bit overwhelming right now.

If I take it bit by bit there isn't anything I can't do or be or have.

Life is only shit right now because I've allowed it to get the better of me.

Ok, strictly that's not true, but the allowing it to get the better of me is.

I'm a fighter.  I'm a doer. I'm a sorter outer of shit. How could I have forgotten that?

My mojo just got a kick up the backside.

So now I'm going to bed because tomorrow (well, later today) is a brand new day and I'm going to kick some ass!