fudge

Saturday, 11 February 2012

Christmas Cake and Kisses

Tonight I have mostly been eating Christmas Cake.

I know, it's February and before you have the frankly ridiculous notion that I am the kind of person who still has Christmas cake lying around since December I feel I should point out that I bought it today.

If you were wondering where you can find Christmas cake in February it's simple, County Stores, a little independent shop in town that has undulating wooden floors with little slopes and unexpected steps designed to send the unsuspecting shopper full tilt into into a rack of spice filled paper packages.

Where you can buy just about anything you want from handmade chocolates to tall bottles of olive oil suffused with lemongrass and basil sealed with a cork.  Candied fruits and hand carved ham, crystallised violets and jars of homemade pickle .....  It's a proper old fashioned shop and one day it shall have a blog post all of its own.

But I digress ....  (One day my digressions may have a blog post of their own too ...)

Tonight as I said, I have mostly been eating Christmas cake 

THIS much to be precise!!!

Now, much as I love Christmas cake it's no secret that food and I don't always have a good relationship.

Usually It's me not eating enough but not so tonight. 

Tonight I feel pretty much like Figgy (the hamster - so called because he is brown, round and full of fruit and nuts).

I have OD on the craving for sweet, soft icing and rich, brandy soaked raisins.

I feel bloated and frankly rather sick.

So why do it?  Binging is not something I do ever and I have to tell you, I'm not enjoying the feeling much.

I have had, to be honest with you, one of the shittiest weeks ever!!!

I mean full on, like you wouldn't believe, crap coming from ALL directions.

Stuff that wouldn't even make it on to one of the soaps it's so bloody far fetched!

Sorry to just allude to it and then (possibly) frustratingly not explain, I would if I could but right now I cant.

I actually wrote you a rather witty (I think) post on the three possible scenarios for valentines day and I may well publish that one in the next day or two but I'm not in the mood to do the enormous amount of editing it really needs so I'm just here for a ramble and a moan right now.

If I keep shooting off at tangents then blame the brandy in the cake :)

Remember a couple of weeks ago I told you I had an indefinable feeling that something had changed?  Something that touched me profoundly?

Well, it never went away and, although, as yet, I haven't had any conformation that my feelings are in any way justified, I just know. 

I don't need to be told.

I know ...

I suspect I'm starting to sounding particularly mad at this moment ...

Yep, well I'm going to shut up about that now before I start scaring you :)

SO

That's the Christmas cake explained but what about the kisses?

Well, I haven't been getting any for a while that's for sure.

BUT!!!!

Miss Mac had her first kiss tonight!

She has had a really shit week too but tonight all that was forgotten.

When I knocked on the door to pick her up from a friends Birthday party she practically burst out of the door thoroughly over excited, grabbed my hands and we did a little jig down the road as she shouted,

I HAD MY FIRST KISS!!!

That may in part explain the cake fest ....

She's 12 ....

Ok, NEARLY 13 but she's my BABY!!!

I don't know how I feel right now (ok, I do ... sick and that may or may not be the cake ;).

I suppose it's a huge milestone for her and she is so please and, having done a thorough analysis of him on FB since getting home, he SEEMS like a nice enough boy but bloody hell, she's ONLY 12 ....

I think I might ring his Mum tomorrow to discuss his intentions ....

6 comments:

joeh said...

If this young man is also approaching 13 I can tell you his intensions, but you already know.


Cranky Old Man

Finding a skinnier me said...

I agree.. it has been a crap week.. though that Christmas cake looks very yummy.

How exciting about her first kiss.. but I have to agree, as a mom, I think I would be a little sad to see her grow so fast!

Hope your weekend is better than your week.

Kelloggsville said...

Step away from the rest of the cake, it's mine and I'm on my way over. I too binge. Yesterday after a particularly bad episode with my mother it was a whole bag of splats. I cat just do some, I can't stop myself and it is all. I'm all or nothing. I gave up the purge part many years ago but never got over the binge part. But one persons binge is a normal sized meal to another. Half a cake once in a while won't hurt you. Let it pass. As for the kiss, stalk him.

pam said...

Sounds to me like you're in a transition phase. Transition phases are very disorientating but useful flags because you know that when it settles down, life will have changed and improved. You have grown a little, and these are just growing pains. You are just getting used to co-ordinating your new dimensions.
It'll pass. Enjoy the cake and the feeling ill, and the worrying about Miss Mac, they're all keeping you on the path. x

Adam said...

I have no words of consolation nor wisdom, I merely have the words: "by 'eck that's a lot of cake...."

Obvious words they may be but words all the same.

I'm going to try and leave this comment board quietly now.

:skulks off:

Sarah Mac said...

God Joe, don't tell me what I already know but am trying to ignore .... ;)

The cake was delicious fasm - my weeks been very up and down but the beach on Saturday helped a lot :)

I plan to K!!! I think my binge might have been partly hormone related and I've given most of the rest of the cake away but never fear, there will ALWAYS be cake here for you! x

I think you could be absolutely right PP - it feels like things are shifting and changing - not just physically but in the way I view things, the things that I want and how I see the future. It's pretty tough right now but the alternative is far to painful to carry on with.

Haha, what can I say Adam ..... yep, it was :)