Well, I'm DECORATING doncha know and I'm SO busy!!! So I thought, seeing as everyone I know seems to be planning their Summer holidays right now (and no, I'm NOT jealous because I have lot of stuff planned too)I thought I would be very helpful and re-run this post because you may all be so busy with life in general that you just don't have time to make useful lists of all those things that really make a holiday go smoothly.
You can thank me after you've read it if you like ...
I just read a Facebook status from a fellow blogger - actually, she's not a FELLOW blogger, she's a lady with one of those mega blogs that I don't even aspire to because they look like FAR too much hard work ...
Anyway, the status update read:
'Best packing tip... GO!'
And she's so far had over 80 fricking replies!!
You know what my latest update said? Well, no, you don't so I'll tell you ...
'Complete panic with much screaming and some bad language when I couldn't turn the hot tap off!!!
Then I turned it the other way ... I should have been an engineer or something ...'
And you know what I've got??
One solitary 'like' - one ... One ... ONE!!!
Anyway, to return to the point ...
Most of her replies said things like:
'Pack a light change of clothes in your carry on in case of lost luggage.' (6 likes for that one)
Lots of them said use zip lock bags (whatever they are) for your toiletries and use plenty of tissue paper between layers ....
Get real people, you don't need ANY of that stuff!!
You know what MY holiday essentials are?
1) Protective head gear (for those times your daughter exits the awning at the same time you enter and BREAKS YOUR BLOODY NOSE!
2) A sick bag and blindfold for when you take the cliff path Lamorna and you get 90 % of the way there and the damned cliff path has crumbled into the sea and there is a 4" ledge to walk along for several feet with a 200ft drop to certain death with no barrier AND SD won't even entertain the idea of turning back because he can SMELL the coffee from the little cafe at the harbour.
3) Proper sun cream to avoid having to stop at a little shop in the middle of nowhere to buy blue kids stuff that turns your daughter into a Smurf.
4) A large basket to hang over your arm as you cycle through the country lanes so you can pick up the potatoes that fall off the back of the tractor that just thundered past you scaring the shit out of you and take them back to cook over the gas ring (I recommend slicing them thinly and kind of TOASTING them) - as I once said, don't think of it as picking stuff up off the road, think of it as foraging or vegetarian road kill or something ...
5) Toilet roll (self explanatory really ...).
6) A local dialect book (in my case that would been Cornish) so that when they say things like 'Heller' you don't confuse them with posh gits from Bloomsbury and think it some kind of greeting when in fact what they actually said was that your child is the devils spawn.
7) A variety of hair pieces to save you time and to ensure that you always look perfect groomed ... Actually, I confess - that ISN'T really one of mine (but don't you just LOVE how it blended in seamlessly ...), it was in fact a packing tip from a member of the TOWIE (The Only Was Is Essex) cast but it COULD be a real time saver for SD and I don't you think??
So yes, I think that about covers it and I am of to pop my very useful tips onto that bloggers thread, I'm sure she will be MOST impressed and I hope you have found them useful too ...
Last night SD and I passed this lovely little cottage in the country with a small field in front of it containing 5 sheep. Now I have a love/hate relationship with sheep as you will know as in, used to love 'em/now hate 'em but it did look like such an idyllic set up and it set me musing ...
You know those FB quizzes? Yes, you know you do! - they kind of suck you in don't they?
I mean, who DOESN'T want to know which book you should read based on your zodiac sign or which Hogwarts house you belong in or how much you have in common with Taylor Swift or which Telly Tubby you are ...
So, I thought, how about ....
WHAT WOULD YOUR SHEEP NAME BE!!!
I know, I almost choked on my own saliva when I came up with that one!!!
I'm torn between two, mine would either be:
Sylvester - no, NOT Sylvester sheep but after Stallone ie RAMbo OR ....
Bloody hell, can you believe I've actually FORGOTTEN the other one .... It was REALLY good too, even better than Sylvester. I KNEW I should have text it to myself ... I shall text myself now to remind myself to ask SD to remind me what it was I forgot ...
What would YOUR sheep name be? Can YOU come up with any FB quizzes as good as that one?
if anyone is interested I DID in fact write that quiz and could rerun it tomorrow if you like and at some point I might even write an original and show you that bathroom which is 96.5% finished (just a few additional touches I'd like to make) AND eventually I'll even show you the dining room (which is about 87.3% finished!)