She came home from college saying that she was going out with a friend and wouldn't be home for tea as they were going to stop by at KFC for some monosodium glutamate with a side order of salt.
That after I'd especially defrosted a 12 pack of Sainsburys finest sausages (to be served with roast potatoes, veg and gravy).
(I would like to say at this point that my assumption that Val was talking about putting her socks on when she said "I put my little sausage biscuits in the microwave" was perfectly justifiable (In my humble opinion) given the aversion she has for those appendages attached to the end of ankles and indeed I thought it was SHE who was talking in euphemisms!.
Miss Mac went to her bedroom to change out of her already perfectly respectable clothes and to retouch her already perfectly applied make up before meeting her friend.
Hearing much rummaging and clattering (with a smattering of bad language) issuing from her room I went to investigate.
Miss Mac it seems had mislaid her bank card which she needed to take out some money to pay for her KFC.
I was reasonable and logical ... No sniggering at the back!
When did she last have it?
A few days ago when she checked her banking online.
Where did she do that?
In her bedroom.
Ergo - the bank card MUST be in her bedroom right?
But apparently she had looked EVERYWHERE and it wasn't!
Reasonably and logically I pointed out that if it wasn't in her bedroom it MUST be somewhere else and therefore that can't have been the last time she used it.
Miss Mac was impressed with my powers of deduction ...
She ran up and down the stairs a few times. Emptied bags and pockets on to sofas, floors and tables. Bemoaned the fact that her life was now OVER and slumped onto the (now overcrowded) sofa to sob a little.
Super Mum that I am I took control.
I stripped her bed in case that pesky card had somehow got caught up in the covers. I pulled the bed away from the wall in case it had found it's way down the side. I pulled out all of the storage boxes from under the bed, emptied her beside table drawer onto the floor and pulled all of the dirty clothes out of the linen bin.
Then there was knock at the door - her friend had arrived.
I heard her tell her the bad news and, in response to her friends question I heard her assure her that her bedroom was quite tidy so no, she hadn't just lost it in the detritus of teen living.
I guiltily surveyed the maelstrom that was now her bedroom with clothes, makeup and sheets festooning the floor and then I spied it!!!
The missing bank card WAS in her bedside table drawer (which is where she swore she had put it), the card was flat against the front of the drawer with the blue side against it so that the back of the card, which was white faced out and was almost invisible against the white of the inside of the drawer.
'FOUND IT' I shouted down but, UMMMM, well your bedroom might NOT be quite as tidy as it was ...
Miss Mac ran upstairs and
'I hope you are going to put all that back as you found it' she said which is surely MY line???
'But I only did it to find your card so you could go out and you wouldn't have to contact the bank and get them to issue a new card and so that you wouldn't have to ask me if you could borrow money until it came through and then never pay it back ....'
'AND I FOUND YOUR CARD YOUR UNGRATEFUL CHILD!!!'
Miss Mac thought for a while and then said:
'Well, I still think you should tidy it up because you were the one who bought me that bedside table and, if you hadn't, then I wouldn't have had a drawer to loose my card in in the first place and we wouldn't have had this problem'.