fudge

Monday, 5 September 2011

A Great One Liner

Write On Wednesdays


Write On Wednesdays Exercise 13 - A Great One Liner...This week you need to come up with one good line to describe a part of your day. It can be 'real life' or fiction. But it must tell us 'who did what'. It has to be an amazing line, like a tiny little paper plane that must travel a big distance (figuratively speaking) with only a few folds ... Every word in that line must earn its place, or be cut as excess baggage. Let's get thinking about each sentence as though every word counts, like working one group of muscles to show how much weight they can carry.



I would just like to say that Gill is getting officially meaner!

I'm not sure I CAN write a stand alone one liner.  I've spent all day trying to be much cleverer than I really am and  the best I came up with was:

"Like clocks from a dandelion the slightest puff of wind will detach from our lives those who wish to be free.  Those who chose remain will stay with us through the fiercest gales". 

Which is of course TWO lines anyway!


I then decided to steal a line which involved trawling right back to February on a friends FB wall because I couldn’t remember the exact wording (yep, back on it briefly but I don't think I'll stick around for long).  This is obviously where I should give proper credit but I'm having a  DILLIGAF moment (which also happens to be a stolen line ……..  Ummm, from the same person as it happens ;):

"Easy come, easy go..... Who wants 'easy' - I like adversity - its way more rewarding !!!"

And then my daughter came home from school after the first day back after the Summer holidays and gave me the perfect one liner which is the one I'm going with:


"It's so important to have the right 'stuff' so that people don't have anything to make fun of you about"



Such a sad indictment of the pressure children are put under today to conform.  My little Miss Mac is bright, funny and beautiful. But having the right pencil case, the right length skirt and even the right drink in her damn lunchbox seems to be all that matters to some people.

And yes, she does have it all so yes, I am aiding and abetting this narrow minded bigotry because it matters to her and therefore, it matters to me.

I’m not sure why I’ve turned this weeks prompt into a rant.  I guess I’m just tired of stereotyping.  My children are individuals and perfect just as they are.  I’d quite like to keep them that way!  

25 comments:

The Musings Of A Small One said...

As much as I can sympathise monumentally with your daughter's one liner, bringing back several memories from my school days, I have to say I really liked your attempt. Considering you said you struggled, I actually think it was extremely meaningful and you should give yourself more credit! Good job :) Zx

Madmother said...

Great work! I should have stolen a line from my oldest...

"It is embracing your own kind of normal,whilst there are things it makes me struggle with, it also gives me a different outlook on the world and uniqueness creates greatness."

Damn, didn't even think of it.

K.D.Storm said...

You did a great job with them all. I had an issue with it at first. Then I closed my eyes and hoped for the best.

Sandra said...

Good work; I really liked your spirits and the way you have tried your level best.

Adam said...

I like that you managed to spin the post out to tell a story as you slipped the one liners in here and there.

It is sad that kids feel the need to conform to certain standards. I think it has probably always been that way though. I would like to say that hopefully with education and life experience most kids grow up and learn to be tolerant.

However, I maybe cynically think that, it shifts from you have to have the right pencil case to fit in to you have to have done x or y to be "successful" by the time you are 30 etc. Life seems to be about playing the game and jumping through hoops. It's fun to jump through the wrong ones sometimes, just to see what happens! :)

Sarah Mac said...

All very true Adam and I guess in some areas we do all need to conform but I like to mix things up a little sometimes.

What I really hate is to see individuality stamped out. It does get easier as you get older to care less about others opinions (or maybe that's just me:)

The Dotterel said...

... and the pressure to conform gets worse. In my (elder) daughter's case it's beginning to cover the TV programmes one has to watch, the music you should like and - from nowhere - the food you have to eat. for the father of a teenage girl that's frightening.

Andy said...

Your daughter must be clever as you are..hehe..I already like her now..But I think she still needs more comforting words from you..=)

Finding a skinnier me said...

You have such a smart daughter. Love her one liner! And I have to agree that one liner's are hard, having trouble myself.

Stephanie said...

Amazing one liner!! You breathed life into those words and it turned into magic!! Great job!
Stereotyping is one of my pet peeves; I grew up being scrutinized constantly. I hope by becoming a teacher, I can provide a little help to children by learning that we are all equal. :)

Sif said...

From the mouths of babes, hey? Mind you, she got it in one! Well done!

Lene said...

This is the perfect one liner. I think you (and your daughter) have captured it perfectly.

My daughter is nearly 9 and we've started with all of this already. And yes, I try to make sure she has the 'right stuff' as well. Like you said; It matters to her therefore it matters to me.
Although I do try to encourage her individuality as much as possible as well!

Melissa said...

Your first attempt was powerful, as was the one from your daughter. They could both be expanded... and I hope you do :)

Anne said...

I think all of them were great Sarah, as always! You have such a way with words!

Anne xx

Jodie Ansted said...

I found this one difficult to, hon...but you did great. :) x

Meg Dunley said...

HA! thank you, I like that you managed to amuse me with the story of how you deliberated with this...I also found confining myself to ONE LINE! Eeep.... I also should have waited for my boys to have come home from school... always able to sum things up so simply! Thank you again xx

asampler said...

Your daughter has perfectly summed up the greatest pressure on teenagers - the need to fit in. It's tough watching them try so hard, especially if you've tried to encourage them to just be themselves.
I really enjoyed your two-liner. Such a great image of something so fragile staying despite the gales.

Car said...

Oh I have some friends that I wish would make like the dandelion, I also am VERY lucky to have those who face the fiercest of gales with me, by my side.
Lovely line, also loved your daughters line, unfortunately for some people even if you have the right stuff, it still isn't good enough for them & they will find something else to knit pick about. Sigh, I am so not looking forward to this when my daughter gets a bit older.

Thanks for your comment on my (long) line, you can move up here any day... I should have added the photo to go with the line - glorious!

InkPaperPen said...

What a line from your daughter? It is sad but so insightful. I remember similar feelings..

Yes, I am getting nastier and nastier, I thought we might scare people off this wee but we have had a record number of linkers! Karen has this down pat.

It was a tough week but an important one, I think. I am pretty pleased that everyone rose to the challenge, isn't that great?

Gill x

Sarah Mac said...

Thanks Z,it brought back memories for me too which is possibly why I hate it so much.

My own attempt possibly could have been left with the first sentence.

Thanks MM and yes, you should :) that's a great one liner!

It was HARD KD :) I really liked yours too.

Thank you Sandra. I think I tried too hard for a while but I was pretty happy with the one I went with.

It does Dotterel, my children are 12 and 13 and it covers just about every aspect of their lives sadly.

She is pretty clever Andy and yes, lots of hugs and comfort needed :)

Really hard FasM but you did a great job with yours :)

Thank you Stephanie and I can't think of a better aspiration than yours!

Thanks Sif, children talk a lot of sense dont they?

They do start young Lene and although I silently rebel I do understand how important it is to them.

Thanks Melissa, I could fill a book with words of wisdom from my children, maybe I should start off with a blog post :)

Thank you Anne x

Thanks Jodie, I think a lot of us struggled with this one but there are some truly great ones out there. x

Thanks Meg, I was right wasn't I, Gill is mean :)x

It's so hard watching them struggle AS. I value all the people that have stuck with me and been very sad to see some go.

You're so right Car,having all the right things doesn't always make any difference. If someone wants to be spiteful they will find something. Having had rain and wind all day today I may seriously consider a move :) A photo would be lovely if you get the chance to add one.

I've been gobsmacked by some of the posts Gill and wish I'd written them. Some pretty clever people out there!

Sannah said...

Well done! I am impressed that you gave three, even if one of them was 'given' to you. So sad that children are pressured so much, just so they can fit in. I really wish that I could change it sometime. I think it is wonderful that she obviously has an insight into it, it's a start at least.
I think that I am still struggling with conformity, and perhaps it will be a lifelong thing that I will have to challenge myself about what I am doing for me and what I am doing to fit in. I guess my children will be the same, regardless of what I try to say to them, no matter how much I tell them they are unique and beautiful and that they shouldn't feel the need to conform.
Definitely a lot to think about in that one line, I have started to rant too!
Thanks for visiting my blog :)
xx Sannah

Jayne said...

I adored your dandelion imagery.

Your daughter is extremely insightful.

Sarah Mac said...

Ha ha Sannah, I could rant all day about somethings! In fact, I seem to have been having yet another rant today, oh dear :)

Thanks you Jayne, she is a pretty bright girl :)

therhythmmethod said...

You are a feisty one Sarah. I love your daughter's one liner. Very clever little lady there.
I like the imagery you come up with for the dandelion, but there's no glue holding it together. Perhaps you need to think of a character first, then take a dandelion, and let them have it out until your one line boils to the surface? I know you have it in you. Think of a girl lying in the park, twirling a dandelion between her fingers ...

House of Prowse said...

Yes, I liked your first one too. A great image!