Wednesday 8 June 2016

Where Have I been?

Or, to be more precise, where HAVEN'T I been???

Actually, that's a far longer list so maybe I should just stick to here I HAVE been for now ...

To save it being a really long post and so that I get to the funny stuff before you all get bored I'll just say it in photos:

First, at the Colston Hall in Bristol:


Then on to Swansea and the Liberty Stadium to see these guys:

Super Furry Animals

Who were supporting THESE guys:

The Manic Street Preachers

Then BACK to Bristol to:

One of my favourite music venues

To see THESE guys:

Wheatus (of 'I'm Just A Teenage Dirtbag Baby' fame)

So a completely mad musical whirl crammed into 8 days and, in between, I also went here:

Weson-Super-Mare - primarily to the first of the Vdub events of the year but I took an hour or so off to wander around the sand sculpture festival - aren't they AMAZING???

Oh, and we also went here:

Golden Hill Shaftsbury

Where they shot the iconic Hovis advert.

You may be wondering why I'm dressed like I'm going to have tea with the Queen?

Well (and to set your minds at rest I feel I should point out that I was wearing a pair of Sex Pistols Dravens on my feet to counteract the 'lady' in me who was trying to break out).

Anyway, we HAD been going to another show - the Vintage Nostalgia show where everyone dresses up and we were meeting a group of friends.  But we got sidetracked and ended up in Shaftsbury instead with me dressed like the lady of the manor and SD dressed ...  Well, more like a redneck it has to be said:

Complete with comedy beard (sadly now shaved off)
And yes, we DID get some odd look but then we found this:

Lean on it like you own it SD!

All it needed was a shotgun on the back seat and a Rottweiler pacing up and down to complete the picture.

So yep, THAT'S what I've been busy doing as well as spending a little time down at the park doing some guerrilla gardening with Bob and this little fella:

SO tame (that's Bob's legs NOT mine if you were wondering!)

One morning we were joined briefly by our noble secretary who, leaning on a spade confided to me:

'We have a corner cabinet in our bedroom ...'

There was a long pause while I rested my foot on my fork and waited for further enlightenment ...

'Keep our valuables in it we do ...'

I contemplated this for a while wondering why he was sharing this information with me.

'Doesn't quite fit - got a bit of a gap at the back ...'

I wondered if he had heard of my prowess in the carpentry department and was about to ask me to dust off my saw and chop it up into tiny pieces and put it back together again so it fitted perfectly.

'Guess what we put down there?'

'A FARTING DUCK!!!' I shouted out - the heat and the suspense was getting to me by this point ...

'No, no, no, no, no .... NO!'

Our noble secretary looking slightly surprised although I don't know why - it seemed perfectly possible to me given his remarkable resemblance (as mentioned before) to Jim Trott in The Vicar Of Dibley.

I was going to include a clip here but there doesn't seem to be one on You Tube sadly.

I recovered myself enough to ask what it was they actually DID keep down this gap at the back of the corner cabinet in their bedroom which didn't quite fit and which they kept their valuables in.

'ODD SOCKS!'  he told me - ''We stuff all our odd socks down there and then once a year or so we pull them all out and try to match them up!'

I'd so much rather it had been a farting duck ...

Miss Mac and a friend who is also doing photography at A'level decided to go to Bristol yesterday to take some photos.

Did she want me to pack her some lunch I asked.

'Just for me' she replied - 'T has decided to become a Vegan so she won't eat our cheese.'

'She's not REALLY a vegan' confided Miss Mac - 'I told her that you can't be a vegan if you still eat meat and anyway, who would WANT to be a vegan anyway?

No meat, no cheese, no milk, no chocolate, no eggs - I mean, what CAN vegans eat?'  She continued to rant a little more.

'For goodness sake - just about all they can eat is nuts isn't it and who ever said - Hmmm, I really fancy a tasty NUT???? - NO ONE that's who!!!'

'Anyway, she only said that because she tried some almond milk - ALMOND MILK - honestly Mum - how the hell do you milk an ALMOND - I mean, did you EVER see an almond with a nipple - well DID you????'

I confessed that I hadn't and Miss Mac and friend went off to Bristol and had a lovely day sharing the cheese sandwiches that I had made as T decided that Miss Mac was probably right and ain't nobody got time to milk an almond ...