Other Peoples Children

I like children, mine, my friends, my children's friends, random ones in the park or walking down the street and I'm lucky because generally, they like me too. I'm not just a baby person, or toddler person or any age really, I like them all.

 I'm not a perfect Mum by any means, just ask MY children. I have failed to provide my daughter with a Unicorn so far and I have no idea what my son is talking about when he tries to discuss the complexities of the latest xbox 360 game.

I'm also an embarrassment, I wear short dresses to PTA meetings, eat all the fruit out of the Pimms and then leave because I'm bored.

Mmmm Pimms!

I forget sometimes that they are almost teenagers and try to hold their hands when crossing roads.

I run down the road after them in the morning barefoot and clad only in a funky monkey dressing gown designed for a 12 year old when they forget their PE kit.

But generally, they think I'm ok and their friends think I'm ok too as I'm the Mum who lets them have sleepovers and trash my house.

Mostly when I see a badly behaved child in a shop or in the street I don't judge, no one has perfect children and no one is a perfect parent.

But SOMETMES a child is just vile!!

Once, in Sainsburys I TOLD SOMEONE ELSES CHILD TO SHUT UP!!!

I didn't mean to really, I was repeating it over and over in my head as we stood at the checkout (no self service for me today) but I didn't actually mean it to come out of my mouth! The child in question was about 8 years old, whinging and whining and generally being a real pain, on and on and on ….... I tried ignoring it. I then tried visualising grinding her head into the shopping trolley or accidentally running her over with my trolley and in the end settled for the shut up mantra.

The funny thing is SHE DID!!! The mother seemed grateful rather than outraged as you might have expected and the child? Well, remember that wind tunnel look?

I probably wouldn't advocate trying it yourself but boy, it felt GOOOOD!