Sunday, 17 April 2011


THINGS happen to me!

Now, I'm not convinced (however many people tell me otherwise) that THINGS don't happen to other people too.

This new craze for self checkout in supermarkets for instance. Never yet has it given me the 'seamless shopping experience' it promises. Why does it talk to me if it doesn't want me to answer back? 'Unexpected item in bagging area' is the favourite! Why wasn't it expecting it? I just bloody scanned it didn't I? 'Please remove item from bagging area', which one? I have 12!!! ' Please wait for assistance', flashing lights, loud beeping, everyone's looking at me like I'm trying to make off with 3 bananas, a twin pack of loo roll and a packet of custard creams!

My children now prefer not to shop with me, it always ends in (my) tears but, unsuspecting friends still insist I use the self checkout despite my protestations, telling me its so quick, so easy, what can I say MORE FOOL THEM, they learn the hard way.

Sainsburys last week, 'friend' use the self checkout, 'me' no, 'friend' use the self checkout, 'me' noooo, 'friend' use the damn self check out will you, 'me' ok. Five items required three visits from the assistant with their magic swipe card and then, just when you would think nothing else could go wrong, I emptied the contents of my purse into the little change compartment (don't you love it when you do that and the total cost of your shopping is four pounds ninety eight, your change that you've poured in comes to four pounds eleven and you only have a ten pound note to pay the balance, you end up with more change than you were trying to get rid of!).

Anyway, I digress, this time, the machine happily swallowed my money but the screen still flashed, 'please insert coins or notes to the value of your shopping' It had EATEN my money! No flashing light, no beeping, no bloody call for assistance. I stood there jumping up and down waving my arms (my 'friend' long gone) until eventually I attracted the notice of an assistant. Followed lots of head scratching and 'are you sure you put the money in', Yeees. 'I'll just call someone else' and 'I think we need a supervisor' by which time I was hanging my head in shame.

Have you ever seen the inside workings of one of those machines? Fascinating! Ten minutes unlocking various bits, tracing the path my money should have taken, 'are you sure you put the money in', YEEES before finally, they located it. A further five minutes to put the machine back together and then, THEY EXPECTED ME TO DO IT ALL AGAIN!


Amanda said...

LOL even though I regularly have problems at the self check out (boxes of nappies seem to get that nasty error message) I still am somehow addicted to using it.
And doesn't your blog have just the best name ever? SO TRUE! If it wasn't Good Friday with all the shops closed I would be off to buy fudge. (I don't allow myself to make it because then the quantity is just way too much and it kills me ...)

Sarah Mac said...

I just have to drift in the general direction of a self check these days out for my local Sainsburys to open up a dedicated (manned) one for me.

I love the name too, it's one of those little snippets that someone said that just stuck with me and it IS sooo true.

Homemade fudge is the best but yep, huge quantities! Im lucky enough to have a tiny shop near me where you can watch them making the proper old fashioned crumbly fudge in fantastic flavours, lemon meringue, strawberry cheesecake and lot more.

Life In A Pink Fibro said...

Loved this post. I have exactly the same problem with the self-checkout - always when I'm in a hurry I get the 'unauthorised item in bagging area' thing. Drives me nuts!

Sarah Mac said...

I was possibly nuts to start with, technology just highlights it sadly.

Rukzrockz said...

Lol!! It looks like you've struggled quite a bit :P It was an amusing post and i like your style. It was a fun read. Regards, Rukz over at http://www.anxstrestime.blogspot.com/

Fiona @nlpmum said...

Selfcheckout - pah. I have never, repeat, never gotten through one of those things by my self. Bloody things always go off on one, we have to call in the emergency services and the whole thing turns to custard. I won't go near them now. I just wanna know what'd wrong with real people giving us real service... don't get me started!

Anonymous said...

I am always using them, but they still manage to drive me up the wall when it said 'unexpected item in the bagging area'

Sarah Mac said...

Ha ha - go on Fiona, do a ranty post about it ;)

Tell me about it Cjl - always gets me - WHY is it unexpected when you just scanned it??

Nikki - A Mother in France said...

Ha ha, luckily these haven't hit this part of rural France yet! I did experience the joys though when visiting England in the Summer. I didn't have the courage to go through one myself, but my sister did and we only had to call for assistance twice!

Sarah Mac said...

Nightmare Nikki - take my advice - step AWAY from the self checkout! :)